What would it feel like to replace confusion with clarity? To replace doubt with knowing what needs to be done and how well we are doing. In the flow.
Is "knowing": an intuitive sense we all have or an accumulation of knowledge and experience. It's both but the intuitive sense is with us from when we are infants and sometimes it takes us a long time to acquire all the knowledge we think we need. The instinctive knowing is the sense we have when we pick up on the energy of people. It's our higher selves that are void of ego and operate on the spiritual plane. It's also very open to us intellectualizing or assuming we are wrong.
I can't count how many times I have heard myself and others tell me "I had a gut feeling" about that but they didn't follow it. The puzzling part to all of this is that our higher self is always protecting us and guiding us. You just need to get in the flow and believe in yourself. What ever is presenting in your life is presenting for your highest good. It may be something that needs to be sorted out within us that we have been struggling with seemingly forever. No matter. Whatever is before us it is designed to inform us. Pay attention and be curious.
On the doorstep of launching a brand new teleconferencing coaching course I thought it would interesting to explore this concept of being in flow. Although it may sound a bit overused the fact is there has been a ton of research done on this state of mind.
What is this hoopla all about and why is it so great? The research shows that are actually 6 definitions of flow and over the next few blogs I will be uncovering and discussing them.
The first definition of flow is to "be completely involved in what we are doing and feeling focused and concentrating." Well that's worth feeling in my opinion. I think distraction is the more common state. How do we get from a sense of disconectedness which is a distraction to a state of flow. We suspend our agendas and accept. Let me tell you a story.
When I was dealing with my husband's cancer treatments I lost the ability to work with electronics. My memory function collapsed and I went back to paper everything. In part, this was do to the stress of the situation and the way our brains function. So every morning I would sit at my desk and ask myself " what can I start and finish today?" Rather than thinking of all the To Do items on my list, I suspended that function and focused on what was directly in front of me. In the flow.
Starting a business with a partner is like any other relationship…with a twist. It can be quite expensive both financially and emotionally to walk away from the partnership. In addition, the increased workload and possible loss of funding may cause stress that no one has the energy with which to deal.
As in all relationships, the ability to maintain equilibrium by fair and just business practices requires effort on both sides. Without equilibrium, the relationship, and your business, could be in jeopardy.
The question then remains, how do some people succeed at partnerships and others struggle?
1. Look for EARLY WARNING SIGNALS of conflict in yourself (this is the ideal) or in others.
These are: Increase in VOLUME AND PACE of speech.
Increase in INTERRUPTIONS AND TALKING OVER OTHERS.
The discussion turns to COMMON TROUBLE SPOTS.
Make a list of and PREPARE FOR the times (e.g. when either are tired or busy), situations (e.g. the other is late, either have been drinking) and issues that frequently lead to conflict. Common topics that spark conflict among couples are: money/expensive purchases, insensitive comments, frequency of sexual intercourse and undone chores. Watch and listen for them before you get to that feeling of "Here we go again! Why do we always end up arguing like this?!"
Remain focused on the present. Stop getting anxious or fearful about what might happen 3 days from now. Ask yourself, "what are three things I can move forward today?". This will help you to remain on target.
Scale your stress. Imagine a scale from 1-10. 1 meaning “all is good”, 10 meaning” life and death”. When you are presented with a stressful situation, silently ask yourself, where does this event fit on the scale?
Prioritize- everyone feels the stress and it worsens when you get twice the workload because your buddy called in a sick day. Look at the work, create a list of realistic action items, prioritize, move forward.
If you BELIEVE stress will harm you it likely will have a negative outcome. If you BELIEVE that stress will build your "courageous muscles" then the outcome is more positive.
Exercise - walk up a flight of stairs or around the block.
Get outside for your lunch break. Sitting in the lunch room with people complaining will only fuel the stress.
Focus on what you are doing and not on the person that is causing you stress. Rehashing what someone said yesterday is pointless.
Think positive. A stressful situation can be considered enriching instead of distressing. When you think a thought, ask yourself-“does this make me feel good or bad?” If the answer is bad then rethink the thought.
Clear the clutter in your mind through deep breathing.
If spiritual, pray for strength, understanding, and compassion.
Write down your feelings and thoughts. Journaling is a great way to reduce negative thoughts and calm down. Carry a pocket journal in your briefcase and write down what you are thinking.
Limit the amount of time you are connected to the office. Downtime is essential to reboot your energy.
Prioritize. Not everything is critically important. Decide what needs to be done first and focus on completing one job at a time.
Plan your leisure. Make sure you do something nice for yourself.